Previously on Jersey Shore: Vinny wisely took a week off from all the nonsense and the rest of the gang decided to do special things in his honor. These special things included getting drunk and sloppily hooking up with people. They must have a different definition of “special” in Seaside. Also, Pauly and Mike had birthdays, and Mike celebrated with an attitude that suggested this was his third birthday, tops.
This week, we begin with Danny, the Shore Store boss, coming to the house to bust some skulls. He threatens the roommates with, um, more roommates if they don’t shape up and fly right. This would all be a really effective threat if they weren’t already MAKING TONS OF MONEY BEING ON THIS SHOW. Anyway, Mike returns from his walkapout, and we learn from him that every birthday Mike isolates himself to see if anyone will seek him out and talk to him. You know, like a well-adjusted person does. I have to tell you this brings no small amount of giggles to me and Mrs. DLW, who suggested that a clerk at Target could really make Mike’s year by seeing his driver’s license and saying happy birthday. The girls who have to listen to Mike bitch about his birthday couldn’t look more bored if they were being paid to do so (which, come to think of it, they kinda are).
The next day Deena, Pauly, and Snooki decide to work hard for a change. I’m sure this will last and forever change their work ethic. After work, Deena calls Vinny and tries to get him to come to Pauly and Mike’s surprise birthday party. Vinny can’t sound less interested in being a part of this world again. Vinny has easily become my favorite character on the show, mostly by choosing not to be on it. Later on, Deena and Snooki try to learn how to walk like “gangstas”; with the amount of times these two have tripped over, they should just work on walking upright.
