Okay, I’m just going to say it—this episode felt like filler to me. Fun, funny, Dylan O’Brien-filled filler. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I was hoping for something that didn’t feel like…well, filler.
I’ll stop saying filler now.
So this episode, “The Virgins,” was a flashback episode about how each of the roomies (plus Cece) lost their virginity. What I liked about this is that the stories weren’t pretty. And Cece’s story was just stupid. I mean, c’mon, who is going to believe that a high school girl with my haircut lost her virginity to Mick Jagger? If this were the ’60s or ’70s, I’d be more apt to believe it, but I don’t know. I definitely rolled my eyes really hard at that scene.
Overall we learned that Winston lost his to a hooker named Mysteria who was bought for him (and another, creatively named Octopussy, was for a terrible wig-headed Nick with braces, who couldn’t go through with it.) by Nick’s dad. I mean, EW. Do dads do that for their kids? I mean, I understand that Nick’s dad (RIP) isn’t supposed to be a paragon of virtue and morality on this show, but GODDAMN that is gross and freaking me out still. So while Winston had no idea he was sleeping with a hooker, Nick and his dad were having a heart to heart about how the best things in life happen when you don’t let yourself think too much about them.
We got a lot of Fat Suit Schmidt in this episode, which is not my favorite kind of Schmidt. But other people like him, so I’ll shut up about it. Anyway, he lost his virginity to Elizabeth (maybe?), but Nick was in the room high on mushrooms, Schmidt used a disgusting amout of lube, and ended up sliding off of Elizabeth and the top bunk, and landing on top of Nick, who was crawling across the floor. Then they sort of lube-wrestle for a bit. It was weird. The Boyfriend found it funny. I’m just not the demographic for Fat Suit Schmidt avec Lube. Anyway, presumably Schmidt & Eilzabeth end up making the sex and not just sliding around all over each other. Congrats to them.
Read the rest of this entry »