Well, you guys, next week is the season finale and this was kind of the perfect episode to lead up to it–funny, lighthearted, but also really reflective on both what happened and also what might’ve happened if things had gone differently, and overall I really liked it.

The episode had distinct vignettes, so that’s kind of how I’m going to go about covering it.  I’m ridiculously excited for next week and as always, I’m totally unspoiled and want to keep it that way, so anything I say is purely conjecture and if you know anything, PLEASE don’t tell me, okay?  Okay.  Thank you.

Clearly, the Twilight bit was HILARIOUS.  And even though I’m just about vampired out, I  still got a little thrill out of Vampire Matty hangin’ fang.  And while it was not so much arousing, I laughed a LOT at Jake (sometimes known as Jacob)’s abundant chest hair.  I bet this episode was so fun for all of them.  And they spent just the right amount of time on this–enough to be really, really funny but not so long that it got tedious.

Favorite quote of this part: “My brief foray into fiction led me to one obvious conclusion.  I was a hack.”  Something I can relate to perhaps a little too well. Read the rest of this entry »

Can I just say … I’m writing this the night the episode aired, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to wait up long enough for new gifs, but in searching for them, I have been enjoying the FUCK out of the Matty “Holy shit!” gifs all over again.  I found one that has it all in one gif and it is perfect.  Like, it makes me sing songs and bluebirds fly around me and shit.  It’s glorious.

Anyway.  I had the weirdest reaction to this episode.  Like … within the first five minutes, I knew I was going to have to watch it again immediately which, as we’ve discussed, I usually don’t do.  And then at the end of it, I was like … seriously, what the FUCK.  I kind of felt this weird combination of nothing and a pit in my stomach.  In hindsight, it may not have been unlike going into shock.  Which is a weird reaction to have to TV, if I do say, and even now, my thoughts are pretty disjointed.

“You’re like a small cable show, you may not have a budget or marketing, but you’re interesting and you’re catching on with the right peeps, peeps that get you and care what you think!”  Well, Awkward, it’s not Supernatural, but it is pretty fucking meta!  And all the Team Matty and Team Jake stuff just really added to the effect.  I loved Matty’s annoyed thumbs up to the girl telling him that she got why Jenna dumped him, because I would HAVE to think that the sarcastic thumbs up is totally the writers’ internal reactions sometimes, and I’m always into those little glimpses. Read the rest of this entry »

“My giney tickles!”

Let me tell you something, gang–that gif makes me feel things that are most definitely NOT rated TV-14.  (Don’t worry, he’s been thoroughly perv checked.  We’re good to go.)

You guys … this post has been giving me an extraordinary amount of trouble and I thought about just putting it out late, but I really can’t bring myself to deprive you of this sexiness, so I’m just going to share a few basic thoughts while I pull my shit together, and in the meantime, you’ll have a place to talk about the episode and link gifs (PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SOMEONE MAKE A GIF OF MATTY SAYING HOLY SHIT, I NEED IT SO BAD AND I WANT TO USE IT ALL THE TIME ON EVERYTHING!), and then when I form more coherent thoughts, I will join you in the comments!  Sound good?  Okay.

My favorite thing about this episode was by far all the callbacks and … really full-circleness of it all.  This time Jenna volunteered herself on purpose for the Wheel of Pep.  Jenna Lives got back together, she might have had another (not really) “suicide attempt”, which excited Sadie to no end … it just really seemed like they brought a lot of stuff back around and I was into it.  And really, there were other callbacks scattered throughout too–Sadie and Clark’s feud (which, by the way, watch out, because I think there might be a new bitch in town!  Only we love this one, because he’s awesome and only a bitch to bitches, which I support), Jenna getting advice from an anonymous friend, Tamara’s prediction about the grand gesture coming true, the Asian mafia (and especially the crazy bitch’s “just-kidding-but-no-really” faces … I just really loved all that.  It felt like things were really coming together.  And we still have THREE EPISODES LEFT this season, yay!  Looks like next week, Jake and Matty are going to make Jenna choose.  Does anyone else predict that she’s not going to be able to?  That’s my guess.   Read the rest of this entry »

Ohhh you guys … I was SO prepared to feel ALL the feelings over this episode tonight, and I’m obviously excited that Jenna FINALLY admitted that she never fell out of love with Matty, because DUH (and also, neither did I … as you all know).  It wasn’t a perfect episode and it actually had a lot more exposition than I was expecting, but I enjoyed it and might have also been a little confused by it.  Let’s talk.

Sad Matty … I can’t even.

I think part of my slightly less than 100% enthusiasm level (and really only slightly, I did like the episode a lot) was that I wanted like … ALL of it devoted to this.  I was okay with the adult stuff, and even Val and Sadie teaming up on Ally for a little comic relief, but I could’ve done without Tamara and Baby Ricky Schwartz And His Gross Ponytail™ (hopefully that’s what Kyle names his next band).  And also Tamara and actual Ricky Schwartz … he came out of NOWHERE.  What was that about?  Because he thinks she’s getting over him?

I mean, on the one hand, Ricky Schwartz is so gross and sucks so much, but on the other hand, I REALLY miss Tamara’s crazy. Read the rest of this entry »

God, you guys.  This show is SERIOUSLY trying to kill me.  As if just Matty McKibben isn’t enough all on his own, they are now making dreams come true by FINALLY putting Kris Polaha on a show that we all love!  Ugh, we have so much to talk about, but first, the runner up line for title: “Every family has a perv.”  Preach it, Tamara.  Still, I felt like the one I chose would more convey our cat lady spirits around here.

So basically, Matty and Jake both ripped my fucking heart out tonight.  Jenna too.  I think you could probably tell that they were starting to lose me a little with some of the darkness this season, but this episode really brought it all together and made it all work, because all of the emotional punches hit harder after the torture of this season.  Matty and Jenna standing outside with the tux … the tux that Matty was loaning Jake … oh my god, the symbolism, you guys.  The SYMBOLISM.  I could die.  Those two have such amazing chemistry still, and when they both admitted that it still stings, I just … felt all of it.  And you knew it, ya know?  I mean, Jenna’s feelings on Jake are pretty clear at this point, but when Matty didn’t pick up Courtney’s call and said he was “feeling things out” … you knew.  But I feel like both of them admitting it opens a door.

Now, for Jake, I thought that Brett Davern did an absolutely fucking INCREDIBLE job with that reveal.  He looked EXACTLY like someone would look in real life.  You could see every emotion on his face … I think he even got a little paler.  He was amazing.  Really great.  I just loved him putting it all together, knowing it was true, and not wanting it to be true.  Like, when I think about his reaction, it gives me that kind of sick feeling in my stomach. Man.  So good. Read the rest of this entry »

Presented without comment.

Hey guys!  I’m going to actually keep this pretty short.  If you’ve been following my twitter this week, you know that I had a pretty gross-looking eyelid surgery done.  Thankfully, no one has accused me of a failed suicide attempt, and I have been able to watch quite a bit of TV one eye at a time, but still, I should keep some ice on it and it’s hard to type with one hand and all that concentrating (you know … on keeping ice on my face.  It’s a challenge.)

We did have a couple other contenders for title this week, the first being Sadie’s, “Ugh, I hate skanks!  And sentimentality.”  And the second being Tamara’s, “Normally eyeliner is really femme, but yours makes me feel emosexual!”

Let’s start with the secondary characters.  Val was fairly unannoying this week (mostly because she was largely absent).  We did have a brief DILF sighting, but it looks like Kevin is still not in the mood to make nice and Lacey is more on edge.  Ming has been hanging out with the Mafia more, but is also still hanging out with Jenna and T, and I think it was a good move to have her blackmail her dad so she can hang out a little more.  And makeout.  Lissa is still trying to be friends with Sadie, and Sadie is still being a bitch.  A bitch that Ricky Schwartz is in love with!

Yeah, let’s discuss that.  I love crazy Tamara, even though I would totally smack her over the cockblock if it were me.  And Ricky saying her name WAS big time.  Does that mean that he really IS done with her?  Because I’m thinking so.  (Also loved how it highlighted that while Ricky may have moved on, Jenna has not, not really.  But we’ll get there.)  I also liked how this may have kind of answered the question about why Sadie was so chill about Matty’s sabotage (in addition to the fact that he is one to pass out during a makeout session).  Sadie and Ricky holds a lot of comedic potential for me because they’re both assholes in such different ways.  And I also am open to the idea that this is all just about torturing Tamara, which we know Sadie would be willing to do.  Also, TAMARA PEEING HERSELF.  Hahahahahahahahaha! Read the rest of this entry »

And just like that, offcolortv has a new mascot.

Hey, guys!  This post is much later than I meant for it to be, which I feel totally bad about, so probably I should go on a church retreat!

Anyway, I did really want to be able to give the recap my full attention, because in spite of this being a largely Matty-less episode, I really liked it.  There are few things in life that I enjoy more than some hilarious religious humor, and that is no joke.  And I believe I’ve discussed this on the blog before but in case I haven’t, or in case you missed it, I had a fairly long and … let’s just say kind of difficult stint with the Christian church for about ten years, from when I was 15 till I was about 25.  And I kind of wonder if whoever wrote this episode had some personal experiences themselves, because they got a lot of stuff very accurate.  Although I do wonder if things have changed since I was involved, because there’s no way an openly gay kid would be able to just go on a retreat and enjoy himself with most (all?) of the churches I went to.  Everyone was always all crying and trying to Pray Away The Gay™.  No shit, I once got a whole lecture over dinner just for disagreeing with the opinion that all gay people are sluts.  I don’t even know, you guys.

But you know, I really did love how not weird or shoehorned this episode felt, which it easily could have.  Like, oh, Jenna at church camp, haha, funny scenario.  But it made total sense that she and her mom were going to church because they were feeling bad about themselves and guilty about their lives, and Jenna was trying to find a way to be absolved.  It was really logical and well-done.  And I LOVED how quickly horrified by the whole thing Lacey became, because it obviously seemed like a good idea at the time, but then with all the judging and people wanting to talk to you about shit you don’t want to talk about … I was right there with her.

But let’s get back to the church retreat scenario.  The “handsy” thing was SO ACCURATE.  Oh my god.  Everyone is all over each other because of the sexual frustration.  I do remember in college coining the term “Christian Cuddle Orgy” because everyone was just piled on a bed cuddling.  And it was like, at least as far as I remember, girls hugging and holding hands was fine, and boys hugging and/or fighting was fine, and in some places girls and boys hugging was okay, but in other places, you shouldn’t hug because boys can feel your boobs on them and then they get boners.  So you could have like a short, appropriate side hug, or MAYBE high five.  But I did once get yelled at for grabbing a boy’s hand and pulling him out of a coffee shop (Christian drugs, btw) because that might give him “impure thoughts”.  It was about as sexual as pulling on your dog’s leash to get him to pick up the pace, so …  Although I’m pretty sure most Christian boys usually ARE having impure thoughts anyway (see above re: sexual frustration), and in a lot of cases, they’re about guys.  So I doubt touching someone’s hand is gonna send them into a spiritual tailspin, but what do I know?   Read the rest of this entry »

You guys.  The delivery of that line was nothing but pure perfection.  I laughed and laughed.  Well played, Jenna’s DILF.

Alright, let’s talk about this most gif-able episode of Awkward.  (For real, I am DYING for HBC‘s gif post already.)  Not only was this episode heavy on Matty (and hence, eye candy), but he was stripping like he was motherfuckin’ Magic Mike, and speaking of, TAMARA’S DANCE, OMG.  There are already gifs of that and they are as glorious as you’d imagine.  But let’s go ahead and have a look at the one we’re ALL dying for, shall we?

I keep gettin’ older, and they just stay the saaaaame age.

Um, amazing.  That shit looks straight up like the end of an 80′s movie and I LOVE IT.

This episode was much better for me than last week’s.  The love triangle stuff was entertaining and funny, but also gave us some set up for the future of that storyline, and I’m excited about it.  Awww, Matty.  Master Saboteur.  I mean, there was never any doubt that that’s what he was doing, right?  But it was still fun watching him do it.  And you know, we haven’t seen much of it from him so far this year, but Matty is FUNNY.  I loved every part of the peeing in the hot tub conversation.  God, Billy would lose his mind.  He hates hot tubs and he hates when people pee in the OCEAN, much less pools and especially hot tubs.  But anyway, how can Jake be so clueless?  And did Matty ALWAYS strip that much in front of him?  Doesn’t he think that’s weird? Read the rest of this entry »

Awww, Matty … I love you too!

Man, this show goes faster for me than anything else on television.  AND this wasn’t even my favorite episode–I can’t lie to you people.  It was still good, and had funny moments, but it was a little heavy on a few things and a little light on others.

Let’s start with the whole Asian stereotype storyline.  I mean … it wasn’t necessarily OFFENSIVE, I guess, except that any stereotyping is offensive and it basically lumped all Asians together as one ethnic blob, which I feel they might be offended by.  But I do like the idea that there’s an all-powerful, all-knowing group at the school and that they’re a little bit terrifying.  And also, that they wear pink and sweaters with pictures on them and stuff.  But I don’t need so much time devoted to them, especially when it cuts into my Tamara time.

Same with Val.  I like Val when she randomly appears to say shit like, “One minute you’re on top of the world, and the next you’re butt poppin’ meth in an abandoned warehouse with a guy named Rooster.”  Everything else Val, I could more or less do without.  Like, I know the whole thing with her swiping the DVD and getting promoted was part of this story (a “necessary” part is debatable, however), but the whole thing with Tony Blair and Bill Clinton went on WAY too long. Read the rest of this entry »

I know this is what you’re all here for anyway, so you shall have it.

Oh my GOD, you guys, I love this show SO MUCH I can’t even deal with it.  I had the hardest time getting started because there were only about a zillion quotes I could’ve chosen for the title.  Among the other contenders?

• The only thing I’m guaranteed is a prozac attack!
• You know I can’t keep a secret for shit.
• “You threatened to shave my head!”  ”This is what we DO!”
• You’re willing to be friends with Hamiltoe and not me?
• EAT SHIT, RICKY!
• So what happened?  Did she dis you for the Nilla wafer?
• This year I’m gonna let Jesus take the wheel … because I am way too wasted to drive! (This was probably the closest second … classic Awkward.)
• This year, I’m gonna be on top!  Unless I’m in a monogamous relationship.
• Amazing.  I know.  You’re welcome.

Okay, so first of all, god bless this show for picking up where it left off, which is at the winter formal, even though this is a summer show.  I, for one, fucking love a holiday episode, and I don’t mind my Christmas trees in June.  Or New Year’s!  And does this mean we’ll get a Valentine’s Day episode?  Oh man, I hope so.  But let’s focus on this ep, shall we? Read the rest of this entry »