Well, our shows are winding down (or done) and summer is almost here, and you know what that means! So much reality TV! And so much drinking! So go grab yourself a tall glass of Fame Whore Punch (it works because it sounds like a cocktail AND because we want to punch the fame whores, see?) and shit, put it on the rocks, because we are about to get as wasted as all of our primetime hours this summer!
Drink every time:
- someone says, “It is what it is.”
- they get in a hot tub.
- someone refers to other (non-relative) cast members as “family”.
- someone says, “I’m not here to make friends.”
- someone says that this has been an incredible journey, amazing experience, or some variation of those.
- the show switches to night vision cameras.
- someone refers to throwing someone under the ever-present proverbial bus.
- someone says “on the chopping block.”
- someone tells a sob story about why they need whatever money is at stake (extra drink if they’re lying).
- a body part has to be blurred out.
- there’s a fight! (Fight! Fight! Fight!) Extra drink for a girl fight (which we all know is the best fight)!
- anyone refers to an alliance.
- an alliance is formed, and someone immediately declares in a talking head that they’re BS-ing the others (more than one BS-er? One drink for each!)
- someone is staring pensively into the distance.
- someone refers to themselves in third person.
- people pull covers over their heads while messing around, like everyone doesn’t know EXACTLY what’s happening.
- someone listens to a conversation through a wall or door.
- someone threatens to just go home.
- someone is asked if they even really want to be there.
- anything with flashing lights (bam-ba-lance, cop car, firetruck) shows up.
- one cast member wears another cast member’s clothes (extra drink if they’re hooking up).
- someone is pissed about where they have to sleep.
- there are two or more people in a talking head.
- one cast member impersonates another.
- the show cuts to commercial (probably mid-sentence) just before a dramatic reveal or elimination.
- a “celebrity” makes a surprise appearance (extra drink if it’s a former contestant/cast member).
- someone says “make it your/my own”.
- someone cheats on an off-screen/at home significant other.
- someone who thinks they are “100% safe” gets sent home.
- someone says, “I didn’t think it would be this hard!” (or some variation). Extra drink for tears.
- straight girls kiss each other for attention.
- someone drinks straight from a liquor or wine bottle.
- someone talks on a cell phone on speakerphone (ugh, the worst).
Any other ideas? I know there have got to be some other great ones out there, and I can’t wait to hear them in the comments! (And special thanks to twinkiesandwine for her help with this post!)
As always, OCTV disclaimer: know your limits, don’t be a dumbass, entertainment only, and we aren’t responsible for any stupid shit you may do, so don’t do it, but if you do, please tell us about it.