Well last week I claimed that 2 Broke Girls was probably the best new comedy on TV this fall, if not the best new pilot. This certainly isn’t the case with the latter. Hart of Dixie and Revenge take that honor (both are recapped here on OCTV by Melissa and Bethany, respectively). As for best new comedy I might have been ahead of myself with that assessment as well. Don’t get me wrong I still REALLY LOVE the show but the second episode left me wanting and not in a good way. Yes the snarkiness that I expected was still there but some of its magic from the pilot was missing to me. In all fairness my less excited state might have something to do with their damn laugh track. In case you didn’t know (or for future reference when you have your own comedy show that you want me to watch) I HATE when shows overuse laugh tracks.

Seriously, I get it that you think that joke was funny but stop pressuring me to laugh already. I already have enough peer pressure in my life from Yoplait as they really want me to believe that eating artificially flavored yogurt will be the same as eating a piece of fucking pineapple upside down cake. Those commercials are fucking lies. That yogurt doesn’t taste anything like pineapple upside down cake and the laugh track on 2 Broke Girls doesn’t make their unfunny jokes funny. Sorry but it’s true.

Wow I didn’t mean to open this recap with a rant about laugh tracks or to use a yogurt imitating desserts analogy as a way to explain my hatred but this is the kind of weird shit that pops into my brain. Just go with it because it’s really for the best that you don’t try to figure out how I got there. I can’t even explain it to myself. Anywho, let’s get back to last night’s 2 Broke Girls. As I said up above I wasn’t overly in love with this week’s episode but it still had some great moments. Also my love for Kat Dennings is still firmly in tact because that ho can throw down a cutting remark. The highlight for me once again was the opening scene. Maybe it’s because I hate on stupid, overly picky people in restaurants due to a previous life in the restaurant world but really it’s the fact that kale was referred to. No I don’t have a weirdly obsessive love of kale. Well not that kind at least. Nope the real reason is that the yin to my yang, the hot dog to my bun, the doughnut to my sprinkles is named Cale (pronounced like kale) and the following exchange occurred:

Girl ordering food: “I’ll have the veggie plate. But instead of beets, I’ll have kale. And instead of broccoli, I’ll have more kale.”

Cale casually watching from the couch with a straight face: “That’s what she said.”

Yep the rest of the episode was downhill from here for me. I understand if y’all aren’t dying at that exchange the same way I was but really you just needed to be there. It was classic execution in the finest form in my opinion. So what else happened? Well Caroline wanted to start going after investors and more business for her and Max’s cupcake venture and Max wasn’t overly excited. Probably has something to do with that fear of success she has as Caroline so accurately pointed out. Caroline also stole Max and Poor Man’s Adam Levine’s break up scene from Max which caused Max to go off on Caroline for repeatedly getting in her shit and rightly so. Caroline you NEVER take away someone’s chance to mock someone else. That’s just rude. We spend A LOT of time perfecting those put downs and stealing our thunder is just a no-no. Perhaps she should have watched Leighton Meester’s PSA. Don’t worry after an 8 hour break up Caroline and Max reconciled thus their cupcake venture is still a go though their savings dropped from approximately $387 to $364. Don’t worry it was for cocktails and coffee which are legit reasons to tap into any savings account.

Other thoughts on the episode:

• I’m going to need Caroline to get a new wardrobe ASAP. The frilly white getup is already getting on my nerves. Chanel or not.
• Who the fuck wears heels when waiting tables besides strippers? Seriously, this is the most unrealistic thing about the show. Well except maybe the horse living in a tiny apartment yard in Brooklyn.
• If you’re going to have a flavor of chips be a major focus in the episode at least make sure the entire flavor is printed on the bag. Ranch is NOT the same as Ranch and Bacon. Trust me I know. We eat a lot of chips in our abode.
• One night has passed but somehow Caroline was able to afford a haircut to get bangs? Or did I miss the bangs in the first episode. Someone clarify this shit for me.
• Oleg’s creepiness is perfection. Blonde sexy giraffe anyone? He should teach a class at the public library.
• I still think the cupcake idea is played out and they need to do rice crispy treats. (This will never change)

So what did y’all think of episode two? Did you love it as much as the pilot, like it better, or do you think it is losing steam? Would you keep a horse in your tiny ass apartment yard? Anyone look into opening a specialty rice crispy treats business? Are you going to keep watching? Do you love Kat Dennings? Well that’s it for me. Below are my favorite quotes from the episode and as always leave your comments down below! Seriously comment because I need them to feel good about myself.

• “Earl I’ve got something new I want you to try.” “That’s the same sentence that got me hooked on cocaine in the 80s.”
• “The apartment is 3 blocks away.” “I know. 3 blocks and 15 ‘hola chicas’.”
• “Look! Chanel number two!”
• “H-A-N. No trap in my name.”
• “We’ve known each other for two days and you’re already asking for back door.”
• “I forgot you’re equestrian Barbie and you come with your own horse.”
• “Robby if I was gonna go lesbian she’d be the last les I’d be in.”
• “I’m too poor to have a fear of success.”
• “Oh jokes on you! I don’t have a future!”