Something is happening, you guys. I’m… *sigh*… I think I’m becoming disenchanted with Wilfred. It’s not that I don’t still enjoy the show. It’s just that… and maybe this is just me… but it feels like it’s starting to get a little stale. Ryan and Wilfred have new and exciting adventures every week, and the jokes are still just as disgusting and hilarious as ever. Maybe I’m just looking for it to do something more. Which, I clearly shouldn’t be. Weeks ago, I made the observation that you’re not necessarily supposed to get anything out of Wilfred, so really I should know what I’m doing here: simply enjoying. Still… there’s just something bothering me, and I can’t quite put my finger on it.
Last night’s episode was pretty quintessentially Wilfred. It gave you a story line, only halfway resolved it, and left you feeling kind of mindfucked, actually — and it was cheeky about it. You see, Ryan finally meets someone else who can see Wilfred for what Ryan sees him as: a man in what has to be a smelly, sweaty-ass dog suit. The best part? It’s Dwight Yoakam (cameo gulp!). But let’s start at the beginning.
Ryan is cleaning up his house, and his life. He wants to get back on track. Hey, he’s even been updating his resume. Well, Wilfred is having none of this. He’s also having none of the vacuuming, and attacks it. Don’t worry, y’all. He killed it. But, so, Ryan is getting his act together, and as one of his steps, I guess, he decides to go to yoga with his bitch of a sister (who was less bitchy this episode, but I hold a grudge). There he notices for the second time, a really creepy dude following him and staring at him. Honestly, this is pretty perfect casting because Dwight Yoakam kind of skeeves me anyway.
Ryan sort of ignores it, and back at his house, reveals to Wilfred that he’s going on a date. Wilfred does not approve of the woman that Ryan has selected from LoveMatchDating.com, and decides to choose Ryan a real winner. And by “real winner”, I of course mean a chick who claims to like all types of music. Such a noncommittal answer… surely she can’t be trusted. Anyway, Wilfred basically tells Ryan that all the good feelings he’s having about his life aren’t real. Bummer.
Later Ryan and Wilfred are out shopping. While Wilfred is treating the assortment of shoes as his own personal buffet, the creepy dude corners Ryan. His name is Bruce, and he wants Ryan to know that Wilfred ruined his life – and Ryan is next! He wants Ryan to meet him later so they can talk. Before Ryan goes, he asks Wilfred if he’s ever had this kind of relationship with anyone else, and Wilfred unloads a bunch of bull that actually uses the joke “What’s up, dog?” Heh. Ryan goes to meet Bruce and Bruce tells him about all the crazy shit Wilfred made him do, and it all sounds oddly familiar… Except for the part about how Wilfred made Bruce make out with his own father. Also, how he poked a hole in the condom that resulted in Bruce’s fathering Cinnamon Sizzle’s twins. Classy.
But Bruce makes sure to point out that between all the crazy shit that done gone down, he never once doubted that Wilfred was looking out for him. Man, did it just get chilly in this foreshadow, or is it just me?
So Ryan decides to spy on Wilfred after he supposedly leaves the house. He watches Wilfred make a mess in the kitchen and do a creepy reverse-Buffalo Bill, “Would you fuck me? I’d fuck me” dance. He eventually follows him to some gang hideout/drug den and sees Wilfred leave with a bag, which he hides in the backyard. Ryan opens it, and inside is a note that says “Look behind you.” Oh, snap. Busted!
Ryan goes on the date, and the aforementioned winner shows up. Apparently “Ryan” was writing really dirty messages (including another diatribe on the post office) to her, and she finds it HOT. Ryan, not so much. He’s gonna ditch when a condom falls out of his wallet, and Cinnamon Sizzle #2 is impressed. Ryan excuses himself to the bathroom to regroup, and Bruce is in there… for some creeptastic reason. He tells Ryan to test the condom by pouring water in it, and sure enough, there’s a hole. Bruce says that Ryan needs to ditch Wilfred, to get rid of him. Ryan sighs and relents. But the scene’s not over yet, oh no! Now we get treated to Bruce, covering his nose to go flush the toilet where he came out, touch Ryan’s open lips with his finger… and THEN decide to wash his hands. I… I’m… ugh.
One pair of clean hands later, Ryan lures Wilfred into a trip with promises of a full acre of weed for the taking. Ryan leads him out into a field and tries to leave him there, but Wilfred figures it out. Just then, Bruce shows up and Wilfred pretends he can’t see him, and Ryan is all shades of confused. But when Bruce spits a monster loogey on Wilfred, he finally acknowledges that he can see him. Wilfred says he guesses Bruce told Ryan some crazy story to get in his head. Bruce pulls a gun and announces that he’s going to send that demon spawn back to where he came from, basically. Wilfred is all “violence is not the answer,” and punches him in the face. They get into a bit of a wrastle, and Ryan takes the gun. He shoots it into the air, and Wilfred is all “Not up there, you idiot! He’s down here.” Ha! So Ryan, like, fucking shoots the guy. Wilfred is all “well done!” Ryan is taken aback at his own actions – he killed a guy, which Wilfred says was his choice; he didn’t make him.
BUT it turns out they were blanks. Ha ha, oh Wilfred. Ryan demands to know what’s going on, and Wilfred says “Isn’t it obvious?” NO, WILFRED. NO, it’s not. Maybe Bruce will be more help. He steps up and explains, “This shit is complicated.” Fuck you, man, alright? Wilfred and Bruce bid each other a “good game,” and Bruce leaves. A game? Wilfred says it was more of a contest, really, and he won. The real winner was Ryan, though. Ryan had doubts – about what? Their relationship? His life? This isn’t actually clear – so Wilfred put him to the test. And Ryan chose fate over death.
So who was Bruce? We’ll never know because Wilfred doesn’t goddamn answer. Over in a sunny, backlit meadow, Ryan realizes he still has a long road ahead of him. All the changes he’d made to his life just turned out to be “fluffy pink clouds” – illusions. Wilfred points out that they have a silver lining – him. Heh. Ryan doesn’t have to go it alone because Wilfred ain’t going anywhere, awww. And they’re sitting on a log, and Ryan’s plaid shirt makes me think of Forrest Gump, when big and little Forrest are sitting there fishing. It’s touching. Even when Wilfred has to adjust his tail.
- “Hey, what did you do with my hair? I distinctly remember leaving it right here… all over the place.”
- “DIE. EVIL. ROBOT! It’s dead.”
- “He’s not your dog, but he’s your problem.” (this one isn’t really funny… just apt)
- “You convinced me to make out with my own father!” “Everyone at the party loved it; they thought it was edgy!”
So, yeah, I think that episode just sort of pissed me off. I mean, I appreciate it in a Fight Club mindfuck kind of way (especially for that moment when I actually wondered if Wilfred and Bruce were the same person), but goddammit, I want answers. The episodes was funny, and had it’s LOL moments, but… damn. So, what did you guys think? Too much wtfuckery? Am I completely off my rocker, and you’re still loving the show? Tell me how nuts I am in the comments!
Just as a side note: you know what I’m wondering?! When are we going to get to see Wilfred as an actual man? Because I’ve seen promo pics. I’m not imagining this, am