Uhhh … did I miss something?  Was this the season finale?

(Spoiler alert: it was not.  But it sure as shit felt like one, right?)

SO much happened in this episode and it was all amazing.  The three roommates’ stories were pretty separate this week but they all REALLY worked, so well, in fact, that I am torn on where to start.  So great.

I think that, actually, the easiest storyline to tackle is Josh’s (and that’s saying a lot).  After Josh not showing up at Nora’s for a barbecue (on account of being kidnapped by vampires and forced to be in a dogfight in his werewolf form), she informed him that she’s pregnant, thanks to the night of doggystyle.  He of course freaks out because, like Edward Cullen, he thought he couldn’t knock a bitch up, and, like Edward Cullen, he was wrong.  Dear Monsters Everywhere, Edward Cullen is a cautionary tale.  Sincerely, Twihards Everywhere.  So now Josh is going to have a little Renesmee of his own, and if it turns out anything like his dream, that shit is a NIGHTMARE.  But probably it won’t be that bad.

And Aidan … ohhhh, Aidan.  He was so sweet.  And happy for Josh.  I loved that, and it seemed so in character–Aidan loves kids, knows what it’s like to be a father, and is always trying to get Josh to mellow out a little and embrace his humanity.  It was a nice moment, even in the midst of Josh freaking out.

Josh and Nora seemed to leave it at, “It’s early, we don’t have to decide anything yet,” (which, there again, I wonder how many full moons we’ve had since doggystyle night).  I feel sort of weird about the way I feel about this, but … I sort of want them to have it!  Odd because I am usually firmly Team Throw That Baby In The Ocean.

Other than that small interaction at work with Josh, Aidan was firmly involved in the vampire lair, where the Dutch were still visiting and Bishop was still … Bishop-ing.  You guys.  A lot went down in this episode and there were definitely parts of it that just went over my head.  But I think I caught the gist.  The Dutch aren’t cool with Bishop turning a bunch of people recently, because he wants to get enough people turned in the right positions in society, come out, live among people, and probably eventually take over.  How … Russell Edgington, right?  But the Dutch have been around for a long time and know that never works, and they have laws about how big clans can get so that none are more powerful than the rest.  So he wants Bishop to cut his clan by two thirds and then spend 50 years underground.  I’m not really sure why that was part of the deal … if it was to re-indoctrinate Bishop, or to give things time to cool off in Boston, or to punish him … I just don’t know.

I did catch that Marcus was the one who tattled on Bishop to the Dutch, which in hindsight I should’ve put together sooner, since he visited them.  He, of course, thought this was going to rid him of Aidan and put him in charge of Boston, but apparently the Dutch also think Marcus is a little bitch and weren’t having it.

We did get some Marcus history, including an explanation of why Bishop prefers Aidan, and dammit, Show, why do you keep making me like/have interest in people and then kill them immediately after?  I really thought Marcus was a great character, so weasely, and such a good nemesis for Aidan.  I was NOT thrilled to see him go.  And hello?  His scene with Rebecca?  There was so much more material there!

And ah, Rebecca.  She had quite the episode.  I finally came around on her too–I actually enjoyed her in this episode.  Her life inside of Vamp Central was more interesting to me than pretty much anything else we’d seen of her.  I wanted to know more–more of what her place was in the hierarchy, how she interacted with the other vampires, etc.  I can appreciate her wanting to go ahead and die for real, and her wanting Aidan to do it (man, it sucks to be Aidan lately but there WAS some justice in that), and how she really DID understand how she fit into it all.  But it was still kind of sad, and this is from someone who has been really only lukewarm at best on Rebecca until this episode.  But man, that shot of the dust falling around Aidan was just SO poetic.  And like … profoundly depressing.  (So depressing, apparently, that it turns my commentary into the style of My So-Called Life.)

But going back, here are the things I really didn’t understand at dinner.  Obviously, I got the juniper thing–it’s this show’s vervain (TVD) or silver (True Blood).  I understood what Aidan and Marcus were doing and how Marcus was totally betraying Bishop.  I really DIDN’T understand how Bishop took what Aidan said as a betrayal, as I thought it was more Aidan trying to protect Bishop.  I can understand why Bishop was all chopping heads off like it was going out of style (although, come on–chopping heads off will NEVER go out of style … it’s so DRAMATIC, like ripping out hearts), but I don’t understand at all why Aidan flung the table full o’ pregnant lady and saved Hagemann.  I guess maybe he thinks Bishop is getting too powerful?  I know he wants the Dutch to stop Bishop, but I don’t know why he couldn’t go back to their lair himself.  Although maybe saving Hagemann bought him an ally?  The real thing of it though was that it seemed VERY un-Aidan to show such disregard for the pregnant woman.  I know he had to stop Bishop, or at least slow him down, but … throwing a table with a pregnant lady strapped to it?  Even if you think the pregnant lady was a whore who was asking to be compelled, what about the fetuses?  I just thought it was a little out of character and kind of hard to follow, although in writing this, maybe I got more of it than I thought I did initially.

At any rate, I stand by my assertion that in any case, vampire politics are always The Shit™, and I always want more more more.

And finally … Sally.  Wow.  I REALLY enjoyed her story this episode.  That Asshole Danny, abetted by That Moron Bridget, brought in a lady to do an exorcism on the house under the clever and somewhat hilarious guise of “extermination”.  Sally was skeptical as the lady busted out all her best Winchester tricks, by which I of course mean salt, so that Sally couldn’t sneak out and sneak back in later.  Smart!  That’s totally what I would’ve done.  Sally clearly thought it was horseshit, until she found out that it wasn’t, but what I want to know is … if you don’t 100% KNOW, why not hop out BEFORE they finish the salt barrier, just to make sure?  I’m gonna make a note to self for when I become a ghost.

I’m not going to say that Sally’s acting during the most treacherous part was great, you know, the part where the camera was spinning in circles.  But I’ve gotta think that’s VERY difficult and it wasn’t BAD, either.  I think I’ve just been spoiled by the absolutely mind-blowing performances on Vampire Diaries, which, I know … if you don’t watch that show, it might sound ridiculous, but FOR REAL.  Caged Caroline was god-awful gut-wrenching, and even that paled in comparison to Mason first turning into a werewolf on video.

Anyway, it was a serviceable performance and did end with some seriously creepy shit.  I do kind of love that Bridget, while pretty dumb about a lot of things, really is a good friend, and when she stopped the ritual to ask what would happen to Sally and where she would go, I thought that was a great scene.  I loved her genuine, innocent concern for Sally.  And I liked that the lady’s response was that she didn’t know.  It was a LITTLE weird that she played like she’d never thought about it or no one had ever asked, when she was clearly experienced with this stuff, but not knowing was such an honest answer that I didn’t really expect it, if that makes sense.

Billy didn’t like the choice of making the lady look like Sally when Sally entered her body, but I was okay with that.  It’s a device that I feel like we’ve seen before (hello, GHOST), and it was the quickest way to clearly identify that Sally was possessing the medium.  And there was something utterly satisfying about someone finally KNOWING that Danny killed Sally.  I loved her thorough disgust with him, her throwing the money in his face, and Bridget finally getting a fucking clue and apologizing to Sally.  About damn time.

What this means for Sally, I don’t know, but she looked like total shit in this episode and the previews for the next look even crazier.  I already CAN. NOT. WAIT.  And was that a glimpse of 70′s Aidan flashback that I caught?  DYING.

You guys, I know there’s probably stuff I forgot because it’s getting late and just so much happened, so you have to fill in the blanks in the comments.  We have two more episodes to go until the end of the season and I am STILL amazed that this wasn’t the season finale.  Two more episodes!  What on earth other crazy shit can possibly go down?  I can’t wait.

What did you all think?  Favorite moments?  Favorite lines?  Theories?  Observations?  Explanations for some of the stuff that went over my head?  Feelings on Marcus and Rebecca’s deaths?  Opinions on werebaby?  I want to hear it ALL.  Go comment crazy, y’all!