Lonely Boy

Here’s the deal peeps. I woke up with a bitch of a migraine so this recap/reaction post will be written during post-drug-haze if that makes any sense to anyone! If I have too many feelings about Auggie, aka Lonely Boy (and yes I do watch Gossip Girl), then we’ll just agree to let it slide this one time, because of the drugs, right? Let’s look at this as a PSA on the dangers of migraine drugs to the rationality of the mind shall we?

OK then! To the mission!

Annie Walker and her Louboutins are safe and sound on American soil. The question burning on everyone’s lips is how the hell did she manage to keep those white sneakers squeaky clean during a boat ride to Stockholm and then, presumably, a flight to the motherland? Sadly, I believe it’s a well-kept CIA secret…

Fresh off the plane (and my mind just strayed off and landed here for a second) Annie is ushered into a black non-suspicious, FBI/CIA standard SUV and driven to an idyllic horse farm somewhere in Virginia.

I was totally on-board with the notion of the CIA treating Annie to a rural spa treatment or something after that horrible underground prison she just escaped from but no. Of course the idyllic horse farm was just a debriefing safe facility where Annie could sit down and relax to the sounds of the polygraph machine. Her stay was cut short though because Langley needed her to come and save the day once again!

And now…the hug I was hoping to turn into a gif but then my computer decided to go the way of my head and so sorry y’all there’s no gif! But just relive the moment in your head!

Auggie stalks Annie by the elevator (this is definitely their thing) and then the magic hug! Awww! And some wisdom pours out as well. Apparently if you walk into a column once you learn how to avoid columns all together later. Profound. I’m just kidding, I was totally aww-ing and sighing and what not when those two hugged it out. This turned into hissing sounds later on because Annie needs a head check. But more on that later…

Turns out Joan wants Annie to work with Mossad and, surprise, surprise, Eyal! Because Mossad and the CIA have a “fruitful partnership.” Anyone else hear the sarcasm dripping off that statement?

The mission: Mossad has a Swiss asset that has gone missing on American soil. The asset, Karina, aka Miss Milk-Maid-Braid, is in possession of a magic watch that contains information on where to find unicorns…no wait, that was the drugs taking over! In any case, the watch contains secrets that are relevant! To find the milk-maid-braid Mossad needs to use CIAs magical voice recognition ability.

Scary Mossad lady, Rivka (she gets a name because we’re probably seeing her again), promises to share the intel with the CIA if they agree to help obtain the watch. But what she doesn’t know is that Joan has told Annie NOT to share the intel if she gets her hands on it first. Annie doesn’t feel so good about that seeing how Eyal just saved her ass from prison.

Then there’s another magical hug! So much magic this episode you guys! Eyal gives Auggie a hearty hug and then tells him he’s shorter than Eyal had imagined. I have a sneaky feeling Auggie sees Eyal as another rival for Annie’s heart. Or maybe he’s just not the hugging type when it comes to Israeli spies. Who knows?

All hugs over, Eyal’s poor manners come rushing to the surface again when he and Annie locate Karina hiding in a cupboard or something in a hotel room. He doesn’t do well with people! Though you have to wonder how he manages to recruit assets at all if this is how he treats them. Remember the secretary in Paris (season 2) both Annie and Eyal were trying to recruit? He was charming enough then!

Well, poor manners aside poor lil Miss Milk-Maid-Braid doesn’t give much info away before she kneels over and dies on them. Being poisoned will do that to you.

This also pisses off scary Mossad lady who bitches and moans over the whole thing and more or less accuses the CIA of being responsible for the death.

Getting a break from pissed off Israelis, Annie is summoned to Arthur’s office who informs her she’s about to receive the Intelligence Medal of Merit (the one with the cash payment apparently). Me thinks our girl Annie isn’t very thrilled about this award. Seems like the whole thing is just sore reminder of who she had to loose to get it, Simon.

Arthur also reassures Annie that even if she doesn’t show it, Joan is all happy and relieved that Annie got home safe and sound. While the husband sings the wife’s praises, Joan is off on a secret rendez-vous with Seth! There’s hand touching! And sharing and caring! Could this mean, gasp, that Joan is cheating on Arthur? Or is it something more sneaky?

Auggie sends Annie off into the forest with a magical metal detector that’s not magical at all. Sniff. But hurray, they did discover that milk-maid-braid had stopped over in the forest, presumably to hide something, before she was killed. But Annie had also discovered that Mossad wanted something more than just the watch, as in info on a Saudi guy who’s daddy plays golf with someone from the State department. Then Eyal magically appears among the trees because he accidentally forgot his GPS tracking device in Annie’s car.

These things happen.

Together they detect and dig (not Annie though because Louboutins and a white shirt aren’t good for digging purposes) and find a safety deposit box key!

I clearly need to get me one of those boxes to stay relevant.

Back at Langley scary Mossad lady is still scary and doesn’t how you can’t just march into a bank and seize a safety deposit box. American laws, so baffling! Annie convinces everyone that she can pretend to be Miss Milk-Maid-Braid and get to the box without any suspicion.

And this is where things get interesting! Apparently Mossad, or at least scary lady, want something more from Annie or the CIA than just this one thing. Seems like Annie has been chosen because of her relationship with Eyal?

After promising Auggie a beer meet, Annie retrieves the watch from the box just to have it snatched away again by a former CIA agent who now works for Saudi guy. Pursuit ensues, Annie gets the watch, bad guy falls and sprains an ankle, she shares the intel with Eyal despite Joan telling her not to.

This can’t possibly be good.

We find out that Room 428-R is not a secret meeting place for Seth and Joan to engage in wild sex but rather a meeting of CIA addicts. I knew Joan wasn’t cheating on Arthur! Phew. But so obviously Joan has some issues with pills (not migraine drugs mind you) and has had them in the past I assume. So that was the end of the whole pill drama from last week’s episode? I was hoping for something a bit juicier! I wonder if Arthur knows about this addiction at all?

PTSD Annie takes over when Annie is confronted with an empty house where her lover was shot and killed. So she checks into a hotel instead of facing her bad memories. Then Auggie comes over for a visit to find the house all dark and empty and that’s really sad! Obviously those two are not even close to mending the fences of their broken friendship.

And Eyal invites Annie to stay in his Washington apartment.

Some thoughts on all of this: clearly there is something much bigger at play here; Eyal is using Annie to get something but what? Is he using her to get intel from the CIA? Because by giving him the info from the watch she was definitely sharing intel she wasn’t supposed to. Or is this about something else? Scary Mossad lady is definitely pulling the strings on this one and I don’t think Eyal is entirely happy nor comfortable with what he’s doing. He didn’t tell the lady about inviting Annie to stay in his apartment. So, was he just being nice to Annie or did he do it so he know where she can be found at all times? I think he cares about Annie and therefore he’s not completely into using her as he would any asset. If Annie continues to share intel with Eyal isn’t she in fact a double agent?

Auggie and Annie are soooooo far away from each other right now. And this is why I made some hissing sounds. Annie really is little girl lost here. She has proven that this season. She’s more reckless, she disobeys direct orders, scoffs at Joan trying to be nice to her, leaves Auggie hanging out in the cold, and continues down a road of destruction by shacking up at Eyal’s place. Is he the next Simon? I mean, what is home girl thinking?!? Why doesn’t she turn to Auggie instead of Eyal? I really wish we’d see some efforts made to repairing Auggie and Annie as friends. I miss their little beer meets and discussions about the agency.

And the little factoid about Joan recognising Annie as a younger version of herself? We don’t really know much about Joan’s background, except the whole Lena and Nairobi thing. Did the loss of the asset/lover in Nairobi cause Joan to seek comfort at the bottom of a pill glass? Joan may have mixed the professional and the personal together like Annie did with Simon (and could be doing with Eyal) and thus she sees Annie heading down the same (dangerous) road as she herself did once. I would definitely like to know a bit more about this, especially because Joan has always been a very one-note character which makes it harder to relate to her.

Wow, this is getting looooong! Thank you if you managed to stay with me and the drugs all the way to the end!

Anything I missed? Anything y’all want to add?

Next week: Auggie Christopher Gorham directs!