Those of you who know me know that there has been a long documented account of Stephen Amell’s crush on me. That is to say, I’ve been documenting it and he hasn’t been denying it so it’s obviously true. He & I got off to a bumpy start back in his TVD Brady days but we made up & have been the objects of each other’s affection ever since. Or something like that. Probably nothing like that, really, but that’s not important.
The point is, as soon as Arrow got picked up I pretty much begged to do this recap. I mean, it started as a joke on Twitter…me babbling about doing a recap for the show that would go something like “Abs, abs, abs. Shoulders.” Then I got introduced to SB (how we didn’t already know each other is a mystery) and it wasn’t just a joke anymore…now, here we are. Dreams DO come true!!
That said, I’m a little afraid. I know nothing about Arrow…other than the background we’ve been given through the promos. I’m not a comic book kinda girl…it’s not my thing. Seriously, the only thing getting me to watch this show is Amell. (no pressure, Superstar!) I really wanted to go into it with an open mind…no preconceived notions. I mean, it’s not like you’re counting on me for crazy character studies & background info from the DC world…right? You’re here for my snarkful observations and to catch me drooling over Absmell (I hate myself)…right?! Drool with me, won’t you?
One more thing before I go watch: I talked to Stephen & I’m going to try to have an Arrow Fun Fact straight from our boy…an amellyfact, if you will …for each episode. Something fun that happened on set, a favourite moment or just a little “FYI”. I can’t promise it’ll happen every week but I’ll do my best to harass Mr. Amell just enough to make him give in without getting on his bad side. I don’t want to be on his bad side. Not even for you guys.
amellyfact (we can work on the name…I’m open to suggestions) for episode 1: The scene in Act 2 where he’s zip-cuffed to the chair was the first scene he shot and also the scene he auditioned with.
And…I’m back. HOLY SHIT you guys!! I don’t even know where to start. I think once we get a few more episodes in I’ll figure out what’s gonna work as far as recap style…once I have more to go on, more background info…you know. I like doing point form observation type stuff…quite frankly, it’s easiest. And, I assume you’ve all watched so you should be able to pick up on what I’m talking about…there will also be some rambling. It’s what I do. I refuse to apologize for that. What I will apologize for is how long this is going to end up being. Stupid long. Guaranteed.
- Okay. First & foremost I need to know where Oliver got the shit to make the bow & arrows on the island. I can’t imagine he had a “just in case” bow & arrow making kit on the rubber dinghy. Or do all rubber dinghies come with those…I don’t really know. I’ve never been lost at sea. Or on yacht with a rubber dinghy.
- Love the TMZ style drunk Oliver footage. Love drunk Ollie.
- Oh no. The hospital…reunion with his mother…you guys, I didn’t think this show was supposed to get me all choked up but those sad, sad eyes…if he lets that tear fall it will destroy me. I can’t watch men cry. I mean, I love a man who CAN cry…I just can’t watch it. “Mom.” *destroyed*
- I’m kinda girl crushing on Laurel. She’s delightful.
- For those of you who are keeping track…we’re around 11 minutes in and Oliver’s naked. I mean, in a towel…so, there’s that. If you ask me, he really should’ve hung that towel to dry in the bathroom before he came out. It’s the responsible, tidy thing to do. Whatever. I’m not that mad at him.
- Who the hell taught Ollie to speak Russian on the island??? Did they ever say the island was deserted? I don’t think so. But I’d guess, from Ollie’s demeanour & post traumatic stress disorder, that if it WAS inhabited, it wasn’t by a bunch of skilled tradesmen & language teachers just hoping for some castaway to pop by for lessons. Maybe the maid taught him when he was younger & Tommy just didn’t know. What was her name? Raisa? I think so. Either way I like her.
- Castaway Homecoming Dinner: “I didn’t realize you wanted to sleep with my mother, Walter.” *insert unexpected awkward/nervous laughter here* I loved this line. The calm, even delivery was perfect.
- Mom: Hey, son…I know it’s been awhile since you’ve been home & you’ve probably seen some indescribable horrors but, welcome home! I’ve married your father’s friend! I swear we weren’t fucking before we assumed your dad was dead though. Honest. Pass the carrots?
- Flashback: I feel wrong for looking at clean shaven, longer haired Ollie. He just looks SO young. That just won’t do.
- Oliver!! You’re hurting your mother!!!! Though, you’d think it’d be common sense to not be THAT close to your freezing cold & wet (but not shirtless), clearly nightmaring, in the midst of PTSD son when you tear him from whatever’s freaking him out. Come on, mom.
- Just when I was going to say that I think Tommy’s a little cheesy he comes out with “Have you realized how hot your sister got?………………’Cuz I have not.” And I think I might like him. Cute…really, well played boys.
- Ollie & Laurel talking…I’m not sure about this. Is he supposed to be “still” in love with her? Was he ever in love with her? I mean, obviously if you’re in love with a girl you whisk her sister off on a yacht to the middle of the South Pacific (I don’t really know if that’s where they were…I’m just guessing) and sleep with her. Love is sweet!! But really, it’s obviously going to be a serious mindfuck for him since he’s had 5 years with nothing to think about but getting back home…doing whatever his father wants him to do and trying to figure out how to atone for the whole “I slept with your sister & now she’s dead” thing…right? Enter Tommy (with Laurel, I mean)…clearly THAT’s going to happen…I can’t imagine Ollie’s going to be happy when/if he figures out there’s something going on with his BFF & his girl…ex-girl…whatever. There IS something going on there, right? It’s not just me?
- Okay…I do not enjoy these red masked jerks. The need to stop stun gunning Oliver immediately.
- Oooohh!!! The “zip cuff” scene! This is it…this was the first one Amell filmed AND the one he auditioned with. So good!! So REAL!!! It’s like Tyra always says…sometimes you have to let yourself be ugly pretty!! Stephen totally went to the ugly pretty…saliva flying and everything!!! Ewww and amazing!!! No wonder you got the job. ;)
- Jesus you guys….this fight scene, though. The chase, the parkour…it all looks so effortless…which I’m entirely certain it is.
- Bad dude to Ollie: “You don’t have to do this.” Ollie (all growly-like): “Yes. I. Do.” What does it say about me that I really kinda like it when guys get all growly?
- LOL @ the detective guy: “So, that’s your story? A guy in a green hood…”
- Wait…what exactly does the detective dude have against Ollie? Do we know? Did I miss something? Do we know his name yet?
- Awwww…you guys! See, I told you I love Raisa!! I love this “do I really seem different” scene. Ollie seems the most “real” here. The most adjusted & comfortable around Raisa. Mind you, I guess EVERYthing’s an act for him right now…trying to be who everybody expects him to be, who he used to be vs. who he really is now…whatever…I’m thinking too hard now and there are still too many questions for me to even THINK about trying to figure shit out.
- I love Oliver tuck & rolling both silently and invisibly out of the car while “Dig” was talking. Clearly there were macho, badass, combat dudes on the island who held twice a week “tuck & roll” classes too. But only once he was done with is language studies.
- Ohmygoodness, ohmygoodness!!! SALMON LADDER IS COMING!!! (a la Eddie Murphy & “ICE CREAM MAN IS COMING”) Shit. Maybe the all caps was a little much…I mean, it’s not like we haven’t all seen this scene 8,472 times. Whatever…it’s fine. It’s a great scene. I could totally do that too. If I wanted.
- The party: almost as good as Ollie’s abs is Ollie in a suit. Yum.
- “What’s Twilight?” “You’re SO better off not knowing.” Ha!! Excellent. (and true)
- At first I thought Laurel was up to something here…she’s gotta have ulterior motives for this somewhat forgiving conversation, right? But then she seems sincere and then Ollie has to go & play like he’s a jerk to protect her…and he’s totally just playing ‘cuz he’s got a good heart…Raisa said so…and then she’s all pissy ‘cuz he’s being a jerk & now they’re never ever ever ever getting back together…right? (was that too many ‘evers’? I don’t really know that song)
- Hunt’s bodyguard dude has some seriously pronounced brow bones. They’re distracting & freaking me out. Is that mean of me? I guess they just needed to balance out all of the Ollie pretty?
- I am in love with this fight scene. The choreo is SO good & Amell pulls it off beautifully and I think I may have a problem ‘cuz anything that’s all testosterone filled has me completely enthralled and it just seems wrong.
- My favourite line of the episode: “2 million dollars to anybody that can find a nutbar in a green hood!” LOL!! I don’t know…it’s probably just me but Ollie yelling the word ‘nutbar’ cracked me up. Maybe it’s ‘cuz my mom has always called me a nutbar…it makes me feel all warm & fuzzy inside.
- SHIT!!! Detective LANCE I presume…THIS is why he hates Ollie…he’s Laurel & Sarah’s FATHER!!! Jesus. This can’t possibly end well.
- Holy crap!! Wait!! “If I were you, Tommy, I’d just be glad you’re alive.” Ollie sounded all angry at Tommy…is he just pissed at EVERYbody?
- Jesus!!! His father shot himself right there!! Beside him!!! Man…Ollie’s seen some shit!!
- Things are moving too quickly!! It’s okay, show…I’m hooked…I’ll be back next week I promise!!
- SEE!!! I told you!!! Dirty Tommy & Whore Laurel totally hooking up behind Ollie’s back…I mean, I know he was gone for 5 years but it was only FIVE. I don’t like this at all.
- HOLY FUCK!!!! HIS MOM SET THE KIDNAPPING UP!!???? Not cool, mom. Not cool.
How do I even wrap this up? I really enjoyed the show. I’m not sure I expected there to be any ‘funny’ in it so the dry, sarcastic, quick little quips thrilled me. I’m a dialogue whore. It’s true. I think the pilot threw a lot of info at us really quickly to set things up (which totally makes sense) but it didn’t feel overwhelming and the ending was fantastic & quick & amazing!!
I can’t wait to see more Oliver/Tommy interaction…both Amell & Donnell have been documenting their “bromance” since filming started & I think that chemistry definitely carries over to their characters making them more believable, more fun to watch.
I’m guessing there were a bunch of comic book-y things that happened that I know nothing about? You’ll let me know? Do I need to know?
I’m excited for Amell (that’s @amellywood, just in case you aren’t already following him…for the record, his smarts & funny are equal to, if not better than his pretty…so you really should follow!) . I’ve been paying attention since we heard who was cast as Brady on TVD…since then, I’ve been watching him get better & better and playing such different roles: gigolo (Hung); jackass-but-hysterical-when-strung-out-on-‘shrooms boyfriend (New Girl); sensitive guy dating older separated mom (Private Practice) and it’s all just been so good!
Super proud of you, sir!! ;)
Okay…what did YOU guys think? Do we have a new obsession on our hands? I mean, I do. Obviously…what about you…let’s talk in the comments…and, if you want, follow me on Twitter: @erintalkscrap.