Presented without comment.

Hey guys!  I’m going to actually keep this pretty short.  If you’ve been following my twitter this week, you know that I had a pretty gross-looking eyelid surgery done.  Thankfully, no one has accused me of a failed suicide attempt, and I have been able to watch quite a bit of TV one eye at a time, but still, I should keep some ice on it and it’s hard to type with one hand and all that concentrating (you know … on keeping ice on my face.  It’s a challenge.)

We did have a couple other contenders for title this week, the first being Sadie’s, “Ugh, I hate skanks!  And sentimentality.”  And the second being Tamara’s, “Normally eyeliner is really femme, but yours makes me feel emosexual!”

Let’s start with the secondary characters.  Val was fairly unannoying this week (mostly because she was largely absent).  We did have a brief DILF sighting, but it looks like Kevin is still not in the mood to make nice and Lacey is more on edge.  Ming has been hanging out with the Mafia more, but is also still hanging out with Jenna and T, and I think it was a good move to have her blackmail her dad so she can hang out a little more.  And makeout.  Lissa is still trying to be friends with Sadie, and Sadie is still being a bitch.  A bitch that Ricky Schwartz is in love with!

Yeah, let’s discuss that.  I love crazy Tamara, even though I would totally smack her over the cockblock if it were me.  And Ricky saying her name WAS big time.  Does that mean that he really IS done with her?  Because I’m thinking so.  (Also loved how it highlighted that while Ricky may have moved on, Jenna has not, not really.  But we’ll get there.)  I also liked how this may have kind of answered the question about why Sadie was so chill about Matty’s sabotage (in addition to the fact that he is one to pass out during a makeout session).  Sadie and Ricky holds a lot of comedic potential for me because they’re both assholes in such different ways.  And I also am open to the idea that this is all just about torturing Tamara, which we know Sadie would be willing to do.  Also, TAMARA PEEING HERSELF.  Hahahahahahahahaha!

Before we move on to Matty, Jenna, and Jake (and Courtney), can I just say how much I love this show for following its own chronology, and not worrying about the time of year in real life because seriously, who GIVES a fuck?  I was so excited for the Valentine’s episode.  Any time is a good time for a bitter black hearts dance, right?

But … onto the date.  You guys … I know that Jenna was the bitch (kind of) last night, but Jake was also kind of on my nerves, even though I get it, he was nervous and he loves her.  But seriously, you know how when you’re sober and someone’s drunk and all they do is apologize and it’s SO ANNOYING?  Yeah, it was like that here except NO ONE was drunk.  And really, I think that Jake being SO NICE is what will ultimately bring Jenna back to Matty.  And probably on the next girl, Jake will be more jaded and not so nice.  That’s how it works, right?  Just like you don’t want to see all your hard work on a guy (MATTY) being put to use on someone other than you (COURTNEY).  We’re hitting a boiling point here, I think.  Especially with the unreturned “I love you.”  GOD.  There have been episodes where this show maybe didn’t entirely live up to its name, but this moment put the awkward in AWKWARD.  Is there a worse response than awesome?  I mean, probably, but also … no.  Brutal.

If by “awesome” you mean … “oh my god the most horrifying moment of someone’s life”.

What do you guys think about Matty and Courtney?  Do you think he’s just trying to make Jenna jealous, or do you think that he really likes her?  I’d lean toward making Jenna jealous, but then, the armpit sniff … so I don’t know.  Although, he was hijacking Jenna and Jake’s date again, so maybe?  Oh god, though, you know what KILLED me?  Him knowing her allergies and eating off her plate.  TEAM MATTY.  Sorry, I had a moment.  But seriously, this show is torturing me.

So I know that everything I just said about Jenna made her sound like way more of a bitch than just “kind of”, but … I also kind of got it, which probably doesn’t say great things about me.  Have you ever just been so excited about something and ready to have a good time, and then something puts you in a funk, but you’re still trying to have fun, but it’s missing something, but you don’t know what, and it’s just … terrible?  Historically, this has been the story of my birthday, although not since I met Billy (he’s awesome at birthdays).  So … it’s shitty and wrong and so ungrateful, but I’ve been there and I just kind of felt bad for everyone involved.

Alright, I’ve got an icepack calling my name.  What did you guys think of this ep?  Any favorite moments or quotes I forgot to include?  Theories on what’s happening?  Other topics you’d like to discuss?  Valentine’s horror stories?  Let’s do this!  Comments, y’all!