Going into this finale episode, I really didn’t know what I was expecting. I mean, the network kept teasing the fact that Emanda gets all bloodied up and that she threatens people and thinks she might die, but, I mean, did any of us actually believe that they would kill Emanda off when there’s to be a second season?

No. No we didn’t.

But I also didn’t expect them to kill anyone off. So I’m glad that the writers had the balls to do it. I mean, as the episode was going on and Conrad was slamming doors and proposing to Lydia and imploring Victoria to not get on the plane to DC (and also not testify) I was sort of like, “So wait. She’s totally going to die, right?” And after the whole exchange with Lydia where he was totally cool with her not absconding with him, I thought, “So, he’s gonna kill her right?” So, yeah, that happened.

And I won’t lie, when V had Emanda open the engagement present and there was nothing in it and V  said that thing about how Emanda should find someone more appropriate for her, I was really hoping that Victoria would die. Because that whole exchange was SO BITCHY.

I’m definitely interested to see where that leaves the show next season. Victoria was such a driving force on the show and now that she’s just not going to be around (unless they do a whole SHE’S STILL ALIVE AND IN A COMA thing. I hope they don’t.) there’s going to be a serious lack of Queen Bitch. Unless perhaps Ashley takes on that role? *wishful thinking dance*

HOWEVER. Though I’m not going to spend about two seconds mourning Victoria, I really wished we had been able to see the moment when Victoria realized who Emanda really is. Because I really don’t know how they would play that. Even though V was constantly on a witchhunt for Amanda Clarke, I don’t know what she would have done if she actually found her and confronted her when she realized that after all this time, Amanda Clarke is the girl next door. And also, in general, she’s the daughter of the man V crazy-loved. And while I know that doesn’t always mean anything (Snow White is an easy example since it’s EVERYWHERE these days), I think I was secretly hoping that Emanda and V would join forces and go all revengey on Conrad together.

I guess we should talk about Charlotte. I kept forgetting about her during the episode and when they would cut to her and Declan I would kind of groan. Which isn’t good. So lalala Charlotte was being a bitch, whatever. But what I thought was great was when she was sitting alone at home watching the news (as sullen 16-year-olds obviously do when they are home alone) and she saw the news about the jet exploding,which was also when our thoughts about the jet exploding were confirmed. Her reaction was fantastic. When she was calling Declan all distraught-like, I actually thought her acting was really great. And OF COURSE a sullen 16-year-old who is already drug dependent and then learns that she’s lost both her parents tragically would swallow a shit-ton of pills. And while I hope she makes it through, because now I’ve decided I want Charlotte to stay, I sort of want her to be dead so that Conrad and Daniel have to learn a lesson. I mean, if they’re capable of learning a lesson. I don’t know. CHARLOTTE.

However, there were a couple things that sort of rankled me about the episode.

First and foremost: Amily. Going into this episode, I was thinking to myself, “You know, it’d be interesting if Amily showed up again, and it’s completely likely that she will since this is the finale episode.” But it was going along and Daniel and Emanda broke up (I am a-okay with this.) after Ashley (ASHLEY!) told Daniel that she saw Jemanda kissing, and then Emanda awesomely called him out for becoming a Grayson and changing, and then just so casually gave him the ring back. And then Emanda was going to go tell Jack everything FINALLY, and she goes over to The Stowaway with Sammy’s collar and she’s handing it to him and he says something like, “Well, actually this belongs to Amanda,” and I”m all YES YES THIS IS THE MOMENT. And then fucking AMILY walks out and she is PREGGERS and I got all stabby feelig. I am NOT okay with this. For several reasons:

1) C’mon show. Really? A pregnancy? That is SO (NOT) SHOCKING.

 2) This is a disgustingly soapy thing to do. I mean, there are many things they could write in to keep Jemanda apart if they wanted to. But a pregnancy feels like bad writing to me.

3) UGHHHHHH. I just wanted Emanda to get something nice for once you know? God, she lost her father and spent her childhood in juvey and is all ragey and revengey and I just wanted her to have a moment of actual, unbridled happiness. But maybe that’s too much to ask for and she’s like Angel in that if she’s truly content she’ll become evil and run around wearig leather pants and calling Daniel “lover.” Which, actually, would be really fun to see.

Anyway. I’m fucking annoyed with this Amily pregnancy. GOD.

The other thing I didn’t love? The big fight scene between Emanda and White-Haired Shanker. Everything leading up to it was OMG SO GREAT—Emanda being very calm and collected when a gun is pulled on her was ace, and made me want to be her. And the whole chloroformig herself thing? AMAZEBALLS. And her not caring that she’s chained to a wall and Nolan is bleeding beside her and STILL having all the pieces in place to, if nothing else, BLUFF her way out of being handcuffed to a wall was nothing short of fantastic.

AND THIS!

I looooooooved the weirdly sexy way that Nolan said “Kick his ass.” It was all whispery and he held onto the “s”es and it sort of gave me chill bumps? I don’t know. I loved it. LOVED IT. NOLAN 4EVA.

And then we got to the actual fighting and it just looked SO FAKE. I couldn’t believe how bad it was. Like, did they have to use different stunt doubles who look so completely unlike both the actors that it was impossible to actually shoot the scene? I don’t know. It was terrible. The only interesting thing about it was when White-Haired Shanker made the quip about how Emanda took after her mother. Because I was all, “Well that was random. But intriguing.” Because we’ve been led to believe that Emanda’s mom died of cancer when she was really young, which is, you know, tragic, but it’s a thing that happens sometimes. So there was no reason not to believe it.

And then we had the crazy bombshell at the end of the episode when Nolan revealed the Emanda that her mother is, apparently, still alive and that V knew about it. (!!!!!)

You know, I really like this Emanda’s-Mom-is-Probably-Alive twist. Like, a lot. At first I was angry with it (I was still FUCKING MAD about Amily) but now that I’m thinking about it I really, really like it. And I hope that the show sort of goes a little Alias on us. Yes. That will do just fine I think.

I also like that White-Haired Shanker seems to be totally on-board with what Emanda is doing. Which sort of makes me hope that her mom is, like, in charge of the giant faceless corporation that is somehow an even bigger deal than Grayson Global. I mean, there’s a lot of stuff to deal with there and many, many strings, but I like that idea I just came up with in my brain. I’m sure that’s not what will happen.

ANYWAY. There was a lot of good stuff going on in the episode. Parts of it were so insanely soapy that I was rolling my eyes really hard, but I guess that’s just part of watching a primetime soap. Soemtimes there are going to be ridiculous things and I have to deal. But overall, I like where this show is set up to go.

Maybe we can just drop the Porters and Amily completely and have an Emanda-Nolan superhero show. Yes. That is what needs to happen.

 Other Things

OMG EMANDA’S WHITE CABLEKNIT SWEATER. I WANTS IT.

Nolan wears orange pants and drinks champagne at 9 AM. I love him so hard.

“Stay right where you are and do not do anything revengey until I get there.”—Nolan

 I am obviously okay with Ashley and Daniel becoming a thing.

So that is that for Season One of Revenge! That you all so, so much for your reading and comments and bearing with me this year. And, as always, let me know everything you think about this show and the possiblities for next season in Le Comments.

Have a great summer!